Oh god I just realized New Years is coming up soon.

I mean I hate all holidays because they usually just go awful and end up with me crying in a bathroom somewhere but New Years is especially worse. For like the past 3 years or so I’ve always felt suicidal on New Years. And I can’t talk to anyone because it’s the holidays and everyone just oh lighten up it’s the holidays don’t fuck up mine with your bullshit.

Maybe I should try not celebrating it this year; like my mom would ever let that happen.

New Years is my least favourite holiday, then it’s my birthday. Easter and Thanksgiving are usually bearable and then the only one I actually kinda like Halloween because I get to dress up and be someone else but it’s barely a holiday.

I should try not to get my hopes up this year, maybe it’ll make it tolerable.