Tag: oh my god

emmersdrawberry:

If you ever question the depths of depravity available to you in Skyrim please refer to this story;

I am unable to finish the Thieves Guild quest because I accidentally killed an essential quest npc. Erikur in Solitude, you probably know him because his sister wont shut up about it. Erikur was the last quest giver I needed to become the master of the Thieves Guild. He is suppose to be essential, as in he cannot be killed ever because important npc is important. 

‘So where is he?’ I hear you asking.

He is gone. 

Gone into my characters tummy. You see, I was fooling around with the glorious weapon that is the Wabbajack and happened to turn Erikur into a sweetroll….and then I ate him. I ate Erikur. He’s gone forever. Into my tummy. 

I glitched out a main questline because I turned a man into a sweetroll and then I c o n s u m e d  h i m.

grandenchanterfiona:

beautifultoastdream:

siawrites:

lokiloo:

grandenchanterfiona:

fuck-arl-eamon:

grandenchanterfiona:

Speaking of Shakespeare:

So, Shakespeare’s impact on modern culture is felt by basically everyone. 

Even if you’ve never seen ‘Romeo And Juliet’ performed, you’ve probably seen a tv episode using it’s general plot. 

Or seen West Side Story. 

So, how does that work for Thedas, where, as far as we know, Shakespeare doesn’t exist? 

Does he exist and we’ve just not heard of him? 

Or are his works just…not there?

Maybe he has a Thedosian equivalent? I wouldn’t really think that Shakespeare himself would be included in Thedas, but it wouldn’t be a stretch to think that there’s probably a really popular playwright somewhere around. Or maybe even…a popular author…who publishes several books…that are well known in many countries…oh my god.

HOLY SHIT.

Nah, because Shakespeare was a bit if a hack who wrote for money, his works were basically just dick jokes…that even royalty loved…whose works were given too much importance…After the fact….oh no

1000 years later:  “There is no way the Viscount of Kirkwall could have written the Tale of The Champion and The Tale of The Inquisition and everything else that’s been attributed to him as well as fought alongside all those people!  One person is not that talented!  Not to mention, where would he find the time?  And that crossbow?  Such technology was clearly not possible in 9:30 to 9:50 Dragon.  Simply preposterous!”

An excerpt from The Tethras Cipher, by Valmont Sinthorpe (Lowis & Blackmont, Year 35 Empire Age):

… which brings us at last to the body of evidence which is often overlooked by critics of this theory. I speak, of course, of the works themselves.

Consider the Tethras heroes. A ragged, worn-out guardsman. A romantic, valiant lady knight. A humorous, unsuitable rogue raised to Champion. And, perhaps most notorious of all, the Herald of Andraste–depicted by Tethras not as a religious reformer or a controversial political figure, but as a confused elf who was in the wrong place at the wrong time and once put a dead body in a box on trial.

What do these characters have in common? Little to nothing. If they were indeed the product of one author, as the Tethras purists insist, then Tethras himself would have evidenced a precocity and life-experience far removed from the biography we have already examined. It strains credulity to believe that the filthy, hard-bitten world of Donnan Brenkovic could have come from the imagination of a Merchant’s Guild princeling, or that the undying passion of Swords and Shields (recently voted the Dragon Age’s most influential work of literature by the prestigious Chanter University staff) was produced by a man who, according to contemporary accounts, considered phallic objects the height of humor.

However, the texts themselves do betray one unifying principle: the fallibility of authority. It is here that the true nature of the so-called “Tethras canon” becomes apparent.

Tethras was, no doubt, an author. As his best-authenticated work, The Tale of the Champion was very likely a product of his pen, and his presence in Kirkwall from 9:31-9:37 Dragon is attested by Merchant’s Guilt records. But his other works betray the stamp of different personalities, all united under the Tethras name by a single goal: to subvert the prevailing social order and undermine the existing political structure via exquisitely-calculated metaphorical deconstruction.

It is a fact that there was, indeed, at least one other rising author in Kirkwall during the crucial period. Someone whose works must have been immensely popular, judging by the number of fragments which have been found (see J. Lowry Hammertong, Cri de Coeur: A Philological Examination of Kirkwall Manuscript B, University of Orzammar Press, 27 Empire), and who abruptly vanishes from the historical record after 9:37 Dragon. Is the so-called “Mage for Justice” truly the voice of Varric Tethras? Or was he one of many? These are questions the academic establishment refuses to answer …

This is beautiful.

I am so glad that I have seen with my own eyes, a parody of anti-stratfordians with Varric Tethras as Shakespeare. 

allistair-right:

I feel like Dorian is the kind of guy that gets snarkier and more sarcastic the more pissed off he gets especially when he’s in physical pain. Also, he somehow manages to remind you how good looking he is no matter how close he is to death.

This comic is the combination of both.

I was supposed to just practice anatomy today but this works too..

c2s2:

Male protagonist lives alone with one of his grandparents. He has a different being inside of him, capable of mind crushing others. One day his grandparent is kidnapped by a rich villain that is using a hologram duel game in his evil scheme

yu gi oh or dramatical murder?